Do molecular biologists wear designer genes?
"The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up!"
Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
People usually get what's coming to them ... unless it's been mailed.
Your life would be very empty if you had nothing to regret.
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.
It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts.
Love your enemies: they'll go crazy trying to figure out what you're up to.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
Test-tube babies shouldn't throw stones.
The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be
Get forgiveness now -- tomorrow you may no longer feel guilty.
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
"Text processing has made it possible to right-justify any idea, even one which cannot be justified on any other grounds."
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
Your conscience never stops you from doing anything. It just stops you from enjoying it.
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today, because if you enjoy it today you can do it again tomorrow.
Nothing recedes like success.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage.
Fertility is hereditary. If your parents didn't have any children, neither will you.
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.
Resisting temptation is easier when you think you'll probably get another chance later on.
You should emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng.
While anyone can admit to themselves they were wrong, the true test is admission to someone else.
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." -- Albert Einstein
Have you ever noticed that the people who are always trying to tell you, "There's a time for work and a time for play," never find the time for play?
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well. -- Aristotle
Death is Nature's way of recycling human beings.
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Zymurgy's Law of Volunteer Labor: People are always available for work in the past tense.
The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice.
Life is like an onion: you peel off layer after layer, then you find there is nothing in it.
The trouble with a kitten is that When it grows up, it's always a cat -- Ogden Nash.
I like being single. I'm always there when I need me.
Love at first sight is one of the greatest labor-saving devices the world has ever seen.
Binary, adj.: Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes.
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
Winter is the season in which people try to keep the house as warm as it was in the summer, when they complained about the heat.
Yesterday's the past and tomorrow's the future. Today is a gift-- which is why they call it the present.
Nostalgia: When you find the present tense and past perfect.
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did.
The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt. -Mark Twain
A ship in harbor is safe -- but that is not what ships are for.
One of the oldest human needs is having someone wonder where you are when you don't come home at night. -Margaret Meade
Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
There are two rules for success: 1) Never tell everything you know.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it. -Franklin P. Jones
Love and Beauty It is the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It is the dream afraid of waking that never takes a chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. -Bette Midler, The Rose
Was she so loved because her eyes were so beautiful or were her eyes so beautiful because she was loved? -Anzia Yezierska
Love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction. -Antoine de Saint-Exupery
If you want your marriage to sizzle
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up! -Ogden Nash
When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, you think it's only a minute. But when you sit on a hot stove for a minute, you think it's two hours. That's relativity. -Albert Einstein
There are two kinds of people, those who do the work and those who take the credit. Try to be in the first group; there is less competition there. -Indira Gandhi
If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is wherethey should be. Now put foundations under them. -Henry David Thoreau
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